No matter how often her attractiveness is recognized, her perception of herself as attractive was threatened by a comment that had absolutely nothing to do with her appearance one way or the other. Something needs to be different. My man is the only one and the best one for me. Is this a dump-able offense? I hope that this establishes some boundaries and some things start to shift in your relationship. I find it hurtful and though I eat healthy I am worried I will never be the size 6 girl he married Im a size 8 now, and have gained 18 lbs since we met 5 years ago. I know this feels intense and frustrating. In my opinion I would have punched your now ex- boyfriend like I would punch anyone who says that to me, no one should be told that whether they are overweight or not and it doesn't matter if they're a guy or girl.
When I date a man, it means I have chosen him from the many. They know their spouse wishes they looked more perfect in this area. But in all honesty, I was just so busy and not feeling the gym! Some prefer curvy vs super thin. But your way too heavy for your height. It's no wonder you're feeling ugly, honey, but you just don't have to feel that way.
Kindly mention that certain foods might not be the best choice. I feel embarrassed and ashamed. Perhaps the people who are always on the lookout or fantasizing are not truly fulfilled…? I think of the Statue of Liberty. He said that I was never happier than when I was working out regularly and had that outlet and time for myself. He had a bad marriage in his early 20s and then did not go out with anyone for 15 years, until he met me and moved in.
She stood her ground and was everybit of a wife girlfriend mother than i could ever be. Let me know how I can best support you. I know I sound selfish as it is him that has to make the most adjustments, and that makes me upset with myself, too. We want to feel like our guy is thrilled to be with us. Is this just an out for him?? No one has the right to belittle you no matter what.
I am a shell of a woman I was 19 years ago. Are things just not going your way? I think its stupid that you say its fine for a woman to think her man is better looking than all these famous male celebs but then its ridiculous for a woman to expect the same from her man. I took a time out, and counted 70 slow breaths until I could go to sleep. Secondly, if he actually thought you're fat and as a result wasn't attracted to you I guess we all have our preferences and he must really be into anorexic models , why did he get into a relationship with you in the first place and lead you on?. Mostly, I am struggling to trust him since it feels like an ultimatum… Wow, Jess- this is challenging and I can feel your hurt. The first test is for you. I have asked him a couple of times why.
Eventually, I stopped going to places because the first comment people would make was how I got heavier or how I lost so much weight yoyo Dieter here. In a rock solid marriage, yes, you should be okay knowing your spouse finds other people more attractive. Really hard to keep spirits up. Tonight it was suggested with malice that I need to work out more. I was considering not addressing it which I tend to do but your piece may just give me the motivation to say something… Yes, no one has the right to judge your body.
It sounds like you need to do some serious growing up. He does have a job to make her feel he believes she is sexy and beautiful. When we were relaxing together, I put my feet up in his lap and he made a comment about how my ankles looked swollen. Where were you at the time? By that, I mean do you believe one of his friends truly cars about you as a person, and wants to see you and him work it out? Neither of us are 25 anymore. The problem is that I really take offense when I hear him seeing guys in the street and saying how handsome they are and worst, compare them to me. That was so hard to read.
I feel so angry, hurt and disappointed. Perfect timing for conversations I have been having with a couple of my friends lately. Does she have a spiritual practice, etc…How can you bring in ways to support her and one another this way? I used to ask my husband to keep me on track with my countless diets and we got into bad patterns. Finally 2 years ago I left, I moved countries got a half decent job, getting a half decent education and I'm with the best person I've ever met, my husband. I am in a year-long relationship and my boyfriend is a wonderful man. Thank you so much Sarah.
It is also not particularly interesting. The tone in which it is usually said automatically sends me in to the defeated mode as you so accurately described above. So I want the same from him. Usually, if improvements are made in these areas, we will see esteem changes, and we also can assure that we are in sound health and fitness, no matter what we weigh. After a while I actually had fun with it and would bring vegan casseroles over to my in-laws house for the holidays. Even date her a few times, or go out for a drink once or twice.
My ex kept telling me I was fat and obese even though through a year of dating I continued to loose weight. I guess I do not want to live near him if that is how he feels feels about me. That's emotionally abusive behavior, and it seems clear this guy has been exploiting your insecurities and vulnerabilities for his own benefit. Then he told me I was really fat and that I need to lose weight! I really like what you said. But sure, if your view on men is that they will always deal with you just because you share the bed with them, you are probably attracting exactly what you think about.